Comes what may

Now that I have more time on hand, I start to think a bit more about my future, or rather on what do I want exactly. It’s hard to pen down the emotions that are within me, needless to say about the thoughts. Majority of these thoughts are due to external factors, because now that I have more time, I started to read and catch up on the news. (The government is planning to increase the population in Singapore. It has it boons and bans.)

I starred at my bucket list. I was wandering if the points that I listed were what I seriously wanted to do? What do I gain from all these? How do I feel towards them? My mum was the one who questioned me when I started on my 365 drawing project: Cats in Crime. To be extremely frank towards myself, I know I had nothing much to gain. However, the entire process of thinking about what to draw to the editing was an enjoyable process. Until now, I don’t find it as a chore. I like to design. I am happy. My inner self is at equilibrium.

This year I started to work towards my goals. Right now, I am reflecting and thinking of the consequences of each goal. I am certain that there will be changes to the bucket list. At the end of the day (or life), I want to live life to the fullest. Like the tagline “Making the best out of imperfections”, I will make do with what I have and make the best out of them. Well, because I know it’s hard to get 100% freedom, but it doesn’t mean that I do not have the freedom of choice to do the things I like. As long as I am happy, other people opinions don’t matter.

I shall leave you to ponder/wonder with this comic that I reblogged on my tumblr.

(Source: Alan Watts – What if money was no object?)

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Portfolio by Estney

This year, I decided to start to build up on my portfolio. I had spent some time on it and is still trying to complete my projects and fulfilling my dreams as mentioned in my bucket list. I could safely say that I am trying to make this dream of mine (To do up my port folio and be able to showcase them someday.) come true. Thus, the birth of the portfolio. It’s not completed yet, as I just started this year. I am a baby in this area. Hopefully, in the future, I would have better content to present. Please feel free to visit my portfolio and leave some remarks. 🙂 E. 

On this very day…

I become 1 year older. Hopefully, 1 year wiser. 🙂 Most importantly, I want to be healthy too.

(It’s saddening to be sick on my birthday. I am down with flu. Hopefully, I will have a speedy recovery.)

So instead of coming up with wishes, I decided to be greedier and make them into a bucket list. I have been pondering for awhile about what I want. I sincerely hope that I will be able to fulfill them one day. Right now, I have enrolled myself in the process of achieving them.

Digressing a little… 

At the initial start of pursuing my studies, I just wanted a certificate with good grades, so that I will be able to find a good job. It’s very superficial. Through the process, I realised that there are more to it. I learnt to appreciate marketing and communication skills. Never ending amount of reports to be completed, but I learnt to use the correct words. To the extent that, sometimes, I wish people will learn to appreciate the words and not abuse them. As for marketing, whenever I travel overseas, once I saw familiar brands, I can totally imagine the amount of work the organisations have done just to become the leaders. It’s never easy. This is one of the MANY reasons why I love to travel, I don’t want to be stuck here and only to be able to learn and observe through a screen. I want to go and experience it myself. It’s great. Of course, how could I forget about the fun and shopping!

(I no longer care much about my grades, but still… I want good grades. I only believe in putting in effort and do things well. If not, don’t bothered to study in the first place.)

Back to the topic…

I have included the bucket list as a page, so as to serve as a reminder for myself to work hard towards them. Whatever I am doing are solely for the purpose of wanting to lead a better life (not just for myself, but the people who are close to me too) and to fulfill them one day.

And lastly, Happy Birthday to me! Please recover soon!

I wish for everyone to be happy and healthy. And I am hoping to enjoy THAT day too.